Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Randomize
