and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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