hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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