You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Randomize