I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
