I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
