just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
