STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
