Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
