i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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