Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
