He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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