Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
