Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
