...so i touched it.
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.