This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
