I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Randomize
