ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
