new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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