we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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