guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize