I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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