My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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