No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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