You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize