yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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