If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.