Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
