At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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