somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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