Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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