what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
