if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
