Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
