So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Let's get the cat blown out
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