I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
