I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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