you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
