My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
He told me they were just razor bumps!
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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