hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
