separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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