he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Randomize
