my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
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they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
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You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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