you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize