talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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