i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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