your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
