why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix