he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.