Having a random hookup so left but love u
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize