I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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