I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
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